When I was prego with Ike I was somewhat anxious about being a mother of two. At the same timee. Together.
For me, other than prayer and the truth of God’s provision, a means of coping came through blog-stalking other moms with two kids, especially those who had just entered the realm of mothering two. I would read each blog-post carefully, looking for signs of stress, lack of sleep and overall difficulty in raising two kiddos. These are all things I had expected to meet and I wanted to know how other mommas were handling it.
Fast forward to today. Me. Mother of two. Me, mother of two versus the grocery store and Sam’s Club. This morning’s events are quite comical in my opinion and give a great insight to life with two… for any of you stalkers out there…
1:00am Isaac stirs. Insert pacifier and plead with the Lord to keep him asleep.
2:00am Realize prayer was answered as Ike is now really awake and yelling asking to be fed, back to sleep by 2:30. But while nursing I think of all the details of the day ahead of me, then, make myself stop thinking about all the details so that I’ll be able to go back to sleep.
5:30am Isaac waking yet again. Try the pacifier because for goodness sake why would he need to ever eat again in his life?… Finally compute the math right and realize it has been 3hrs and the poor child is starving. Back to sleep by 6:15, after realizing I forgot to put the diapers in the dryer last night, without them I have no diapers tomorrow. Concede to the thought of using a disposable… fall asleep… oh wait!
6:30am Because I’m not quite asleep yet, I hear Jameson begin to cry. God is the only one who knows why. Elbow David, “Jameson is crying.” (He has night Jaymer duty since Ike has arrived.) I lie in an uncomfortable position, eagerly awaiting husband’s return and newsflash on why Jameson is awake. Realize at 7:05 that hubby is not returning. Get in comfortable sleeping position to lightly dream for 20min before alarm goes off at 7:30.
7:40 Drag myself out of bed and immediately search for hubby. Found. In bed with Jameson. Wake hubby. Put diapers in dryer. Get ready while boys sleep. Pull out pancakes from freezer and load blender with smoothie ingredients.
8:00 Start blender, got to wake Jamesy anyways, and pull out pancakes. Hubby and I enjoy smoothies in the quiet. Smile at eachother and pretend we are newly married, up early to go snowboarding…. Thought bubble popped with the realization that we have two boys to get out the door in 20min. (BTW we have to do all of this time coordinating because we have one car and in order for me to run errands I must take Hubby to work first)
8:10 Wake J, as I’m waking J I hear Isaac waking… this is not unusual since my boys have a sick sixth sense about waking at the same time, whether within earshot or not… it’s a lovely trick they’ve mastered… along with simultaneously needing to be fed or changed or pretty much anything.
8:20 Hubby has served up breakfast to J whilst I serve up breakfast to Ike. Both boys are newly diapered and dressed… gonna ignore Jameson’s bedhead though. Isaac fuddles through nursing, putting us past ETD, but hubby is making up for it, filling the diaper bag, bringing me my shoes….ect.
8:35 Ike is done! Mad dash to get everyone out the door ensues. Realize once I’m downstairs that I forgot to brush my teeth or put on deodorant… se la vie…
9:07 Not bad, hubby is only 7min late. Kisses and hugs. Off to Meijer for groceries. Baby boy in Moby, Toddler boy in cart. Grocery shopping with Two, take 1, action!
10:20 Groceries shopped! Forgot to get ginger. Boys were excellent. Only concern is that Jameson opened a box of fruit snacks and then asked to have one… and I let him… future trauma? maybe so, but I’ll fight that battle then… I was asked about Ike’s age only 64 times and only had to stop and small talk 9 grandma’s about the “darling” boys. Oh! Another encouragement, at the checkstand. Checker Lady: “Oh, I wish my boys were that small again!” Me, bitter-mom: “Oh, well if that was true you would be missing out on a lot of sleep, you don’t want to go back to that!” Cheery Checker Lady: “Oh, both of my babies slept through the night from the beginning!” Doubtful-bitter-mom- me: “No way!?!” Not-necessary-bagger-lady: “Oh yes, mine too!” I think I may just stop shopping at Meijer altogether because of this single conversation…. But overall, I’m feeling like SuperMom as we head over to Sam’s Club…. although I can hear the making of a dirty diaper coming from the toddler…
10:40 Arrive at Sam’s, after getting gas, and find the most excellent parking spot, now thinking, “I really am SuperMom.” Well, pride comes before the fall, friends!
I begin nursing Isaac, knowing that he can’t make the shopping in Sam’s without it and I’d rather nurse in the comfort of the car… This is J’s first time having to wait in the car for me to feed Ike, I’m sure it won’t be his last, but I’m curious to discover how he’ll behave. First, he’s fine. Radio on. Windows cracked. People to watch. But, inevitably, he gets restless. Ike is fuddlng some more. To prevent craziness I offer the sole toy I can reach on the floorboard of the backseat without flashing passersby. Toy rejected. Okay, plan Z. Plan Z is always last resort, but today, last resort came quickly. “Want a sucker?” “Sucker!” Sucker not rejected. Silence. Victory. SuperMom. I then go to burp Ike and I discover the reason for all of the fuddling. The yellow reason. All over my pants, his pants and now my hand. Blow out city. All of the hot air in my ballon is sucked out, assuming that I have no change of clothes because I lent them out on Sunday to another mom who had no change for her blowout-boy. Dear dear, fret, decision to be made… I’m going home. SuperMom no more. Unprepared-disaster. Lest us not forget Jameosn’s already full diaper…. So, defeated, I guess I’ll change him and he can ride home nakey. Go to travel wipe container and discover only one wipe. Definitely going home. Sheesh. Then, Back-Up Outfit discovered! New hot air! New hope! Revived and revitalized… (just like my hair, according to the Pantene commercials)… We can do this, now!
11:00 Finish nursing Ike, after a passenger seat diaper change with only one wipe, and one more sucker is necessary to quiet the ravenous sugar lover in the back, I’m still SuperMom.
11:15 Get Ike Moby-ed up and head inside and straight to the bathroom to change J, which should be interesting since I have no wipes remaining. To make things even more interesting, Sam’s bathrooms have no paper towels and I discover J’s diaper is close enough to blowout. Isaac is now crying because he is tired… encouragement again, can’t get enough of this stuff, the lady washing her hands declares, “You could use an extra set of hands!” as she walks out… Nice. Helpful, anyone? I finish the toilet paper diaper change, wash my hands thoroughly and head to the food court because dang it I deserve some sweet tea at this point in the game… caffiene for the droopy eyelids and sweetness for the dropping attitude with the blood sugar levels.
11:40 After standing in line for 10mins, staring at the yummo pizzas in the window, the cashier informs me that they do not accept Visa credit cards, only Visa debit cards… this is good to know here and not in the checkout line in front of 20people with a cart full. So, we head to the car to get cash. At this point Jameson loses it because he thought he was getting pizza. I hear an encouraging “Someone’s tired” from the lady behind me as he ignores my promises of a return. I really need that sweet tea now… and pizza.
11:45 We indulge. Sweet Tea and Pizza. J is mad I won’t let him sit with me on the bench, he has to stay in the cart. Sweet Tea ends that argument… Am I still SuperMom if my kid drinks sweet tea?
12:00 We are out of there quick because our shopping list grew very short when we were reduced to cash only. 2 items. All of that for 2 items.
12:30 Arrive at home, unleash the toddler to fend the stairs for himself, run the carrier up stairs and pray that Ike doesn’t start crying in his car seat for lack of entertainment. Run back downstairs, toddler is trying to carry the milk. Largely disappointed, so I hand him the garlic powder from Sam’s. Satisfied he starts up the stairs, I grab the cold stuff, trying to move as quickly as possible because it has already been too long out of the refrigerator… hurdle toddler on stairs… Upon reentry, realize we forgot to take out the trash this morning, pheesh! Toddler arrives and wants to put garlic powder in the fridge. Jog back downstairs, holding chest because nursing bras were not made to support such an action. Two more trips of cold stuff go into the fridge. Fourth trip I grab last cold items and simply shut the trunk, shelf items can be carried up by hubby later. Coming up the stairs I am bombarded by the toddler throwing his soccer ball and basketball down the stairs, I make no attempt to retrieve them as I can hear Isaac getting worked up over missing out on all the fun… Instead of getting Isaac, I herd the toddler inside, and strip my-only-pair-that-fit-right-now-pants because there is yellow poop all over the thigh and I must get stain remover on it (oh, I didn’t mention that I spent my entire time at Sam’s with yellow poop on my thigh, I must have overlooked it…)
12:45 Toddler discovers bananas recently purchased and begs… I comply, pizza alone is not a well rounded meal. Use the bathroom, since I’ve had to pee since we left the house this morning… Nurse ravishing Isaac, he is always ravishing…
1:10 Change J’s second poopy diaper and put him down to nap, where does so much poop come from? only the Lord knows…
Moments after J is down there is a knock at the door… what? someone looking for SuperMom? It’s the neighbor; I call, “Just a minute” as I retrieve a pair of pants. She has brought up my diaper bag, Sweet Tea and Moby that I had left on the top of the car. Sweet sweet Jerilyn. I get to unleash the events of my day, much like I’ve just done and breath for the first time in what seems like hours.
Bless your heart if you read all of this. I didn’t want to leave anything out. You are permitted to discontinue visiting my blog should you see fit. All three of you. Minus the stalkers.